Sort of. Because I'm still popping in for a couple of Teams meetings for work but -- and this is a big deal -- I don't mind.
My work teams are great, and the people pull their weight. I don't mind popping in so I'm in the loop and there's no pressure to say something smart or the fear of ambush assignments.
For most of the day, though, I'll be attending to housekeeping stuff: budgets, online orders for supplies, errands, paying bills. I'll cook a bit too. And then, fingers crossed, I can maybe sit down and make some art. Warm-up pieces. Small ones. Just to stretch the fingers and the imagination.
And then I'd also like to write. I thought at first I wanted to write fiction but then lately I'm realizing I want to write something in between that and non-fiction. Poetry is one. Another is a series of perspective pieces composed of actual data and personal points of view. Another is something like an autobiography treated with magical realism. The point is to write from something rooted in the ground but expanding into space. Throw in some e.e.cummings-inspired lines, perhaps. I love what Maria Popova does with The Marginalian (formerly Brainpickings). I love Rebecca Solnit's writings. Mary Oliver. Susan Wooldridge. May Sarton. Ruth Reichl. Jeanette Winterson.
Then I also want to do something like the books Nick Bantock and Barbara Hodgson where the words are deeply intertwined with the illustrations and images.
My work deals with a lot of data and facts. My job is to find the point in the chaos of information from which one can leap into a creative idea. But the way of writing and presenting it is required to be distilled and simple. Minimalist.
But I am a maximalist. I want to balance at the brim and then spill over a little, or some, or a lot. I want texture and layers. I want twisting meanings and inventing words. I want to play with forms and layouts, for words to be images and images to be words. I want tangible elaborated context.
I do have an appreciation for clean cleared spaces. I also am an admirer of Japanese Zen design. I love being organized and enjoy categorizing. But always, always, a back door to chaos. My boundary lines for order are never sealed shut. There is always an escape route, an extra seam.
I love patterns, especially the hidden ones that reveal themselves when you look from a certain angle. My work is about seeing those patterns and making something out of them so certain brands can sell more. I want to also use that skill and direct it towards the things I genuinely care about. Like helping in the climate crisis, promoting diversity in as many aspects of life as possible (not even limited to just humans), helping create the waves of change towards sustainability.
This is how it all goes around in my head. Every day. And then I have to deal with not having enough time and energy to do anything significant, hahaha!
But I try. Every day.
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