My current life is an adulting nightmare. I work 8–10 hours on weekdays in an advertising agency and I perform a critical role. I am on cat feeding duties 4 times a day every other day to take care of rescues that have become my father’s surrogate grandchildren which has significantly contributed to his mental wellbeing. I am in charge of preparing meals to ensure that my health-compromised parent’s condition does not worsen. I am on house care duties every day because the other parent has abdicated her role and has been showing even stronger signs of narcissistic behavior for years which has caused much difficulties for everyone else in the household.
I have recently been diagnosed with major depressive disorder and general anxiety disorder. I also have undiagnosed ADHD. Altogether my life situation and my mental health have made getting through every day a major challenge with uncertain endings. Sometimes I win the day, sometimes I don’t.
I enjoy my work but it is extremely demanding. I am on a perpetual steep learning curve. If I fall off that curve I will start losing my value and eventually my source of income. This has been a cause of constant pressure that has fueled my insomnia and my tendency to overwork to overcompensate.
I start every day running and gasping for breath.
My sister said, get back some control. Not through any grand gesture, but by simply owning the first 30 minutes of my day. This isn’t just about productivity; it’s about self-care that sets the tone and pace for the rest of the day.
The Quiet Before the Storm
The 30 minutes becomes a sanctuary of peace. A magical window where I can be just free, be able to listen to myself. A staging area where I get to decide how the day will go, and how I will deal with it if it becomes contrary.
Crafting a Morning Ritual
My morning ritual is not elaborate. It is as simple as sipping my coffee while journaling, staring into the sky, sketching, or sweeping my mind off every clamoring task into a piece of paper or my task app. The activity itself matters less than the intention behind it: to not just be swept away mindlessly and ridden by fear, doubt, and worry.
Setting Intentions, Not Just A List to Whip Myself With
I often use the time to set a priority list for the day and then for the rest of the week. I edit something every day, relieving myself of the pressure of undone tasks, and of things piling up. I journal in fragments, laying out thoughts and questions I could return to later.
Most importantly I expanded my attention and intention not just on what others expect me to do but also on what I want to do. That had an instant effect on me. It helped with the frustration of always running out of time and energy for myself. I started defining and designing the day to include the things that are personally meaningful to me.
The Ripple Effect
This small act of claiming the first 30 minutes of the day has had a ripple effect. By starting my day on my terms, I felt less victimized by my circumstances and I felt less helpless. I began to approach the day from a place of centeredness that spreads out to encompass both my own needs and wants and my responsibilities to others.
A Gateway to Mindfulness
This practice has become a gateway to mindfulness for me, especially for that aspect of myself who is always either too distracted or too hyperfocused. The usual chaos within which I function has begun to have some semblance of useful order. I have been able to fix and adapt my environment to better accommodate my special mental needs that until recently have been neglected. In taking the time, I helped improve how I spend it.
So, tomorrow, when the world is still transitioning into wakefulness, try claiming your first 30 minutes. It’s more than just a fancy routine; it’s a gentle rebellion against the tyranny of the urgent and the expectations of others at the cost of ourselves. It’s when your day can truly begin in your favor so you can, in turn, do better for yourself and others.
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