Undesirable

Dancing a game of catch,

Breathless as my heart

Gets pinched, pressed,

Thumped like a wall,

As if it cannot break,

Poked, taunted, tempted.

I look away, cover my mouth,

I cannot look too hungry

Or I will lose even before

Anything begins, no one

Takes the eager ones seriously.

There are rules, there are lines,

There are points to be won,

There are tests to be passed.

I always somehow manage to

Upset the scales, tip the balance

In my disfavor. The grace

Of my loving is overshadowed

By the disgrace of how I failed

All measures of being desirable.